The Intentional Conversation | The thought process of Robbie Shreffler

 Today I’d like to talk about single mothers. We are all compassionate towards single mothers so this should be an easy way to step into an actual conversation about justice. But before I discuss single mothers, I feel like I should tell you a bit about the congregation that I serve with.

The congregation that I have the pleasure of serving with is three and a half years removed from nearly shutting it’s doors. They had lost their vision and forgotten that they were meant for more than just a Sunday morning service. A new pastor arrives with instructions to re-launch the church. So it was do or die for this congregation. To their credit, they did what was needed to turn things around and begin to head in the right direction.

Fast forward to the end of this past year…

As our church began to explore where we should focus our ministerial efforts for this year, we surveyed the community in which we live. We sought out a group of people that we could actually affect and one that we were already in contact. Fremont is a very diverse place and we could have gone in any of a great number of directions. But as a result of a simple ministry that we began this past year (an amenities pantry that supplies non food household needs and toiletries), we made the determination that our main focus would be towards single mothers and their families.

Our amenities pantry was a meager attempt at doing something compassionate and generous with the things that we had. Like many compassionate ministries it was focused on giving stuff to people without. I won’t condemn people that are in the business of giving, as it is a necessary ministry to millions of people who are without the basic needs of life.

BUT…

Giving can be a great way to insulate ourselves away from the real needs that aren’t being met or the injustices that will never allow these people the opportunity to be free of their oppression. When the church is great at donating but neglects the real reason for the need they are only doing part of the job. You can scroll down to previous posts with scripture supporting the need for justice. And you should know that giving from your excess isn’t justice. It can be a multitude of other things ranging from pity to selfishness (Yes, Selfishness! If the focus is all on the act of giving then the giver is the celebrated party. We aren’t redeemed by our gifts to the poor so we shouldn’t let them woo us into believing that it is enough… giving really is the least we can do!) but it is not justice.

But through the pantry our eyes were opened to many people that could use our help. Single mothers walked through our door constantly to receive the items of our pantry, so they became our focus…

Why are single mothers in need of justice?

In Fremont, CA there are over 3,500 family units that are headed by single mothers. Of that group, over 13% of families with children aged 5- 18 will find themselves below the poverty line. Families with children five and under live in poverty at a rate of 29%. The average rate of poverty in the city of Fremont, CA for families is 3.3%. So we can say that at a rough estimate that single mother households with children ages five and under are ten times more likely to live in poverty than the average family household.

Our first reaction is usually sadness with a little bit of pity. We feel sorry for those single mothers. However we must move past that and come to a new understanding. Our gifts (at the rate we give them) are not enough to get these families out of poverty and KEEP them out of poverty.

The church’s response needs to be two-fold. First, we need to ask why? Why are these mothers and their children at a much higher risk of falling below the poverty line? Then secondly we need to ask what can we do to change that? The church is the advocate for the people whose voice is not heard above the drumming of our modern society.

I’ll let you chew on that for a little while. To start the conversation let’s think of why these mothers find themselves in poverty at a higher rate. There are obvious reason but there are more subtle reasons as well. Let’s hear what you have to say.